there aren’t any words of wisdom or great insights to the world of neurologic disorders… only that there is some road they call acceptance (i personally haven’t found it yet- i don’t think) that we are supposed to travel. i think the end of that road is a place called “new normal”.
there are times when i think i have may found it and turned the right way at that stop sign…but then i find out that, NOPE, not the right road or the right turn… and i turn around and go back… i thought i had visited “new normal” but now i’m not so sure… unless of course, i was there and was booted out for misconduct or something ha!
start all over again… one hell of a road trip though
i sit here today and wonder – do i really want to find that road called acceptance? not really i don’t… but i think i have to. i think it’s crucial to my well-being. since i haven’t yet found it and made that journey – well, i end up hurting myself…i try so hard to continue on with my life as i know it, making minimal adjustments when i really should be making larger changes to my day-to-day routines… i don’t know if i’m living in denial or if i just can’t figure out how/where to make the changes in my routines, but either way, i keep doing things that tend to beat my ass up….
i want to forget… i want to be free of this… i want to feel good… just good..not great…just good…
today is maybe the day that coach finds out if he’s still a coach or not…. we’ve been anxious about this day for a while, well, since this new head coach was hired. i cannot imagine him not being a coach but i guess we’ll cross the bridges as they are laid out in front of us….
what’s the most profound regret of all a life?
“being in a hurry. getting to the next thing without fully entering the thing in front of me. i cannot think of a single advantage i’ve ever gained from being in a hurry. but a thousand broken and missed things, tens of thousands, lie in the wake of all the rushing… through all that haste i thought i was making up time. it turns out i was throwing it away,” confesses a pastor.
it strikes me that when i read these quotes that it sort of applies to what i’ve written… i started writing this post last night before falling asleep… this morning i finished up and added the quote of the day….