Sep 272010
 

4 days later we still don’t know how to come to terms with any of this.
Don’t know what to do.
Don’t know where to turn.
Don’t know what to do (oh wait, I said that already)

Today is supposed to be my MRI and then back to the neurologist’s office. I am hoping against hope that we can start working on a treatment plan. At least then maybe we can feel like we are doing something. Just sitting and doing NOTHING is very frustrating. Is it just eating away at me as I sit here and do nothing? Steadily getting worse…. while I do nothing. I hate this part. I know it’s just how things go but I don’t like it.

Maybe when there is a treatment plan we can start getting answers. Maybe then we can start looking towards the future a bit. Maybe then we can start coming to terms with it. All my lab work was posted last night on my patient portal – and thank you for small things – it was all normal! My liver enzymes were what I was most concerned about…they are good which means any medication will be okay for now. And my white blood cell count was in normal ranges too.

We spent the day with family and friends yesterday. That always helps. It was nice to see everyone… it was the first time my kiddo and my dad have seen me since this started. I hope it wasn’t too shocking for them. Kiddo said she was prepared for worse than what she saw. I haven’t spoken with dad since we left.

Speaking of the dad, he is dealing with his own medical issues right now so this is a double whammy for him. He will be okay – I have faith. I just hate that he’s got me on his plate right now to be worried and anxious about.

Being an adult is like looking both ways before you cross the street and then getting hit by an airplane.

  7 Responses to “MS Monday”

  1. Well, since I am a new follower I almost feel that I haven’t earned the right to comment on what seems to be a huge new direction your life is taking. So I will just say to hang in there, rely on your family and friends when you can, and take good care of yourself.

    • hey Sherri! (you spell it just like me)
      please feel free to leave any and all comments. I look forward to them… truly. I’m glad you are here and I love the interaction with everyone. So please by all means, jump in with both feet!!

  2. Happy your family day went well. That makes that part of the equation easy.
    Remember you are dealing with the “medical profession”…eh-hem…there is no rush on their end..it’s not their illness. I don’t anticipate them improving…Ashley’s recent stays in the hospital have confirmed that to me 🙁
    You know as well as I do that part of being a good parent means we ALWAYS worry about our kids…just part of our genetic makeup 🙂

    Friday will be here before you know it. In the meantime, do what you want to, what you can do and don’t beat yourself up if you can’t.
    If needed, yell into Twitter…I’ll check it during the day 😉

    • oh the waiting! and no MRi today… they postponed me til Friday – argh!!!

      I’m going to try and go back to work tomorrow…. I haven’t been since last week. I’m embarrassed, scared..and I don’t want their pity… I have enough of my own for all of us ha!

      Tina, thank you so much for all your words. You have been a great help to me these past several days. I really look forward to hearing from you…. You always make me smile. THANK YOU!

  3. I agree with you, the waiting is always the worse part. You want to do something, anything, and all you can do it sit and watch the 4 walls. But, on the flip side, you also want to have all the information available so the correct treatment can be implemented. So, there you are, still waiting, but with more information now.

    • You are so right… on the one hand, I want them to take their time and do very freakin test they can think of. I want them to know exactly what’s going on so we can come up with the best treatment plan ever. But hell, I’m going crazy!

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