May 062011
 

I really have no idea what to write about…. so I’m going to just start typing and we’ll see what happens… it’s a risk to be sure… for me and for you ha!
I hate to write only about my MS woes but that’s on the forefront for today… and this is the easiest way to keep family and friends all updated without having to tell the story 15 times ha! If you don’t want to read about the MS stuff just scroll on down to the last few paragraphs… some controversy down there…. much more fun I’m sure…
I had an appointment with the neuro this afternoon… apparently he wants to see me every 4 months… just to sort of check in… that’s fine with me… I like that guy…he’s funny and he’s personable… and overall he makes me feel very comfortable. And he always has such good stories to tell us! ha!
So the headache that has been hanging around for, I dunno, 6 weeks or so…. MS … shit… I was truly hoping it was something like allergies and I could look forward to it going away once spring was done blooming… but nope… I have two pain meds that haven’t been doing much for me… Norco – same thing as Vicodin – doesn’t do anything but make me hyper as hell… yes… it does help my pain a bit but does nothing for letting me get some much needed sleep… and the other is Tramadol… I think this one might be okay but the dosage was pretty low… he doubled it… he said it should knock out the pain in my head… and the various other random pain I get… we’ll see… I’ve taken two doses, doubled… my headache is with me but not quite as intense… if it doesn’t work he’ll give me something else…. I hate the idea of taking so much medicine… I am terribly afraid of addiction – but at the same time, the thought of chronic untreated pain makes me think of things not so good… I have a high pain threshold and it would seem I also have a high medicinal threshold ha!
The other thing he did was double the dose of my blood pressure medicine… it’s been running a bit on the high side… not so high that I’m going to stroke out or anything but higher than it should be. I’m sure that’s because of the Adderall… dang I sound like a regular drug addict… but I’m not! as for the Adderall, I only take it on the days that I work or have many things to do… on those luxurious days when we have no where to be and nothing to do… I call them jammie days… I take no Adderall… and I’ve only been taking 1/4 to 1/2 half of what has been prescribed. I think with the heat amping things up  I may  have to increase the amount I’m taking…
The heat is obviously going to be enemy #1 for me… since it has settled in I have felt like a large pile of moose shit… fatigued… badly… foggy… cramps and loss of balance… headache… and this damn hug thing… I need to find some $$ to buy myself a cooling vest and hat… I think it’s going to be crucial. At work there is so much outdoor junk I have to do… I’m going to be really suffering…basically useless without the cooling vest.
Speaking of the hug, neuro doesn’t think it’s an MS thing…but when I read about it, I’m finding that what I’m feeling is exactly what other MSers describe… who knows. What I do know is that it is incredibly annoying, and occasionally painful…
I continue to draw through all of this… I am so enjoying the ability to make interesting designs. I’ve always had a sort of creative hankering in me… writing, photography, sketching from time to time…. but now it’s really coming out. And it’s been such a big help to me… I am able to sit and draw when my head is hurting and focus on something other than the pain… for a brief time… wonderful!
I wish I had more to tell you about but I don’t…. how about I share a nice picture with you… let’s see… hmmm…

I could tell you that I’m sick of all the UBL shit. I am. I could tell you about how I think it is absolutely horrific to celebrate death in the way that it was shown Sunday night. I’m not saying that the death should not have occurred… it needed to be handled. But I am ashamed that it was celebrated as if it was New Years’ Eve…. Do you remember all the footage we were shown of the people celebrating over seas after the attacks on September 11th? Do you remember how it made you feel to know they were celebrating the death of all those people? Now imagine how they must feel knowing that many Americans are celebrating the death of a man they loved… right or wrong… he was important to many people. 

And I believe that our celebrations are going to add fuel to the already burning proverbial fire… I know there will be retaliatory attacks… I would almost bet that they are sitting and planning now… right this moment…it’s going to happen. Our celebrations are going to fuel the scale and fury of those attacks… just my opinion…

The celebration of death, any death, is certainly not very humanistic… not very spiritual… not very Christian… not very whatever belief you may have… I don’t know of any religious or spiritual faith that celebrates the taking of another life, even if it is warranted. I’m going to shut up now because I know this is an extremely touchy subject… probably shouldn’t have started this at all… risky…
Mother’s Day… what’s on your agenda? I don’t know what’s on mine yet…. I’m sure my daughter and grand girls will love on me a bit… I’m sure coach will love on me a bit… and that’s all I need… some lovin’

My girlie… she’s pretty darn special!

Until next time….
Love one another…. cherish one another… and look at life with compassion….

Being an adult is like looking both ways before you cross the street and then getting hit by an airplane.

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