Mar 122011
 

>last night i was reminded of something that i cannot believe i have forgotten….

i am a shit-magnet

when i’m behind the console of a dispatch center, shit…. it’s attracted to me… not in the “i gotta go potty” sense… more in the “oo sherri’s working! let’s crash, die, and basically reek havoc!” sort of way…. it was a hell of an evening… poor souls…. i said prayers…. and i was sad too….

then finally… finally… my shift ends… time to go home! yea! things can go back to the relative crazy normal of the world…. wrong…. no relief showed up… and it’s not like they can just close my register and i leave…. nope… i have to stay in the hot seat… answering the wacky calls… dispatching the officers…. until someone shows up to relieve me….and that came almost 2 1/2 hours late…. hell

i’m doing my best to stay off my meds…. i’m tired…but  that’s okay… i would rather be tired than feel all jacked up and twitchy from meds….working late really made it bad…. extra tired…. but i made it… came home… so tired….. so tired, in fact, that i couldn’t fall asleep…. don’t you hate that?

i read…. thinking… eh it’s okay, i don’t have to get up early in the morning… i can sleep in a bit…. wrong….our most adoring and loving dog, beulah… well she seems to decide when it is i should wake…. and generally that’s just after coach has had his first cup of coffee…. she comes running up onto the bed and plants her nose on my cheek… and stays there til i acknowledge her… “beulah, …. stop” … my speech causes her to wag the tale, shaking the entire bed… and inevitably she becomes all the more persistent…. pawing at my face now… scratching me with her talons….. i shove her away and turn my back on her…. and then….

she rolls over onto her back in an effort to not only look cutely at me, but also to expose the belly that she so desperately wants pet…it’s her crack… her addiction, the belly rubs…. in the process of the slutty roll-over, she smacks the top of my head with hers…. INSTANT PAIN… for me, not her…. she just continues to wag and solicit for her crack…. and as i lift my injured head creating a space … she thinks it’s for her naturally and wedges herself in deeper….. hell…. i move a bit, she wedges in more… eventually i’m all the way to the edge of the bed, ready to hit the floor…. shit… may as well get up…. dammit….

this is an EVERY SINGLE MORNING routine…except for the head banging part…. that’s the first time she’s managed that one…. bitch… i bet she remembers that move and uses it again….

to top it off….i come stumbling into the living room… coach looks up and smiles “morning baby! why are you up already?” …. asshat 

i think he sends her in there…. he must be lonely in the mornings… yeah, that’s it….


the mess that is my mind

Being an adult is like looking both ways before you cross the street and then getting hit by an airplane.

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