Apr 132013

I may or may not have mentioned here before that I’m a fan of the ol’ fake bake. Yes, I tan. The primary reason is tan fat looks better than white fat. There’s something about the healthy glow of a nice tan….

I don’t over-do it by any means. I do the stand up tanning, go-go dancer booth and hang on to the poles provided for those of us with balance issues. I generally go tan 2-3 times a week for 9 minutes each time. I started this tanning routine a long time ago and I can remember my apprehension when I found out that it’s proper protocol to do so sans clothing… of any kind. I was razzed sufficiently the first few times I showed up with a bathing suit in hand. Live and learn. So anyway…

A few nights ago it was mentioned to me that I had a little white strip that really stood out against my tan. It was located in that area where the two cheeks meet up. And there was a little giggling when it was mentioned. Yesterday while standing in the tanning booth I decided to try and fix that… so as I was standing there holding onto the rails I leaned forward slightly allowing for some light to reach the little white strip. I’ll show him! Pft.

The former little white strip is now a shade of pink and ITCHY! And driving me crazy because we all know you can’t walk around just grabbing ass and scratching any ol’ time you need to. Live and learn.

This past Tuesday I was cutting down boxes so they could be taken away. I have lots and lots of empty boxes in my office. Things that were received and never unpacked. Part of my organization goals are to get everything unpacked and stored properly in the wealth of cabinet space provided me right there in my office. I don’t understand why that was not done by the previous person… I guess he preferred to just stack boxes and forget about it. That office was truly a sloppy man cave occupied by someone who was too lazy to put things in a space. Anyway… in order for boxes to be tossed out they have to be cut down. I don’t have a box cutter. But I have some really nice, sharp utility scissors. I was on my 3rd cut down task when this happened:

cut finger

It’s my index finger… get your mind outta the gutter!

That hurt! And it bled… and bled…and bled… for about 6 hours. Not just an ooze of blood but gushing blood. I thought I might bleed out and die. I’m serious… I have never ever had a finger wound bleed like this one did! I bet I’m anemic now. I won’t be cutting down boxes with scissors anymore. Live and learn.

 Here’s the most recent me:

me april 2013

Being an adult is like looking both ways before you cross the street and then getting hit by an airplane.

  8 Responses to “Live and Learn”

  1. Nasty cut! I don’t do the tanning thing. As a redhead, I only burn, peel and freckle anyway.

  2. Ow! I think it needed a couple of stitches, too. Hope your ass is feeling better!

  3. Ouch. That looks like a MEAN cut. And I hear you about the itching. Many years ago I sun-baked topless. And got my nipples burnt. And how they itched. And itched. And itched. And finally peeled. Gross.

  4. I’m laughing at your itchiness! Put on a baseball uniform, and you can scratch anywhere you like!! At first, I thought you meant a spray tan, but you’re in a tanning booth! Yikes. I’m so afraid of them. I did the salon spray tanning via airbrush once — and I did wear a swimsuit. That cut looks so painful. I remember slicing my thumb once when I was opening a can. It bled and hurt so much. Like your new pic — are you a lot thinner in it?

    JUST GIVE IT A BIG OL SCRATCH!!!!!!!! BAZINGA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  6. Sherri, spray some benzocaine on your pink spots. All will be better!

    That cut deserved AT LEAST a butterfly bandage; likely a stitch or two. Dang, woman!

    • I thought about putting some anti itch topical stuff on the now pink strip but was a bit afraid to LOL such a sensitive little area

      Once the bleeding stopped I wrapped the finger up… I devised a really good bandage that kept it firmly closed and covered. This morning is the first I haven’t had a bandage on it. It’s finally starting to heal up a bit.. You’re right, it needed a butterfly or a stitch or two

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