Nov 272010

>going to the bathroom has taken all a whole new meaning for me….

one of the lovely things i get to deal with now is urgency… uh huh…. like, i have to go NOW!  and this urgency hits me, oh, maybe every 20-30 minutes usually… on a few days i can make it a whole freakin hour without peeing!

day to day the urgency hasn’t been that big a deal… i mean, i’m home…got my own private potty… at work i have my own potty there too… between my home and my office i know where all the good potties are… and when i’m out running around for work, well, that means i’m at a school and they all potties (some closer to the ground than others such as at the elementary schools)… so i haven’t really had to worry about going…

the most traveling we do is to brenham and back..that’s about 90 miles one way…and there are potties nicely placed about every 30 miles apart… perfect! i don’t know how they knew i would need it done just that way…but oh so thankful for the planning and forethought on the part of Exxon, Bucee’s, and Texaco…

the other day though… oh man… it became an issue… and a dilemma, a moral dilemma…. coach and i were out running errands…the day before Thanksgiving (gobble gobble)… idiots… we are idiots… any sane normal person knows you don’t go out to the stores the day before Thanksgiving or Christmas…not a good idea a’tall…

at one point in all our running around… i had to go…NOW!…. we were in King Dollar….not a good place to go potty…dirty! dirty! ewww nasty!…. high tailed it out of there…next stop was Starbucks – oh nice potty! it is just across the street and through the Wal-Mart parking lot…i can do this! maybe…if we hurry… oh gadang! so much traffic! holy hell! hurry up you crazy ass stupid drivers! decide where you are turning…. long pedal, long pedal! go!

ah, finally! Starbucks…..parking lot is incredibly full…. naturally. we manage to park about 100 yards from the front door…although in my urine filled eyes it appeared to be at least a 6 mile hike…. make it in…k, no accidents yet…i’m still dry….

there’s about 4,783 people inside….holy hell (again)… there is a line 3 deep for the ladies room…. it’s a one seater…no stalls….  so we go place our order real quick… then i go back to the area of the line… hey! i’m next!

a lady approaches and she’s doing the dance… you know the one…that bouncy, squeeze the legs together, hopping sort of dance…

now, with MS going potty is something of a time consumer… even though there is a HUGE urgency to go… once seated and comfy, it takes forever to start…and then when i finally get it started….no flow… no flow at all… it’s more of a drip-drip.. drip.. drip-drip-drip…. drip – until my bladder is empty… so you can see, it takes a bit of time

i let the dancing lady go first… i figured she may wet herself right there in Starbucks while waiting on my dripping to end….

as i’m waiting for her, my urgency goes into ultra-high bladder cramping threatening mode… oh no… please hurry dancing lady! as beads of sweat are popping up on my forehead another lady and her small daughter (about 8 or so) fall in behind me… and the daughter is doing the dance…same dance…shit. now i must make a decision….

make the kid wait… or let her go first… hell….

i have tried to make a point of being courteous… i’m slow, i let people go in front of me for all sorts of things… i’m slow and i know it… mostly i let people go ahead of me because they are so incredibly rude… i’ve almost been run over by shopping carts, cars, fast walkers… i’ve been eye-rolled, sighed at… rude rude rude

but this time…. sorry little girl! i have to go… she’s young… she has strong muscles… even without kegels… she can hold it….

i settle in….ahhhh … thank goodness!

and i come out… our drinks still aren’t ready… coach is patiently waiting….

and the dancing lady that i let go in front of me? oh my! she is so freakin rude! she is uptight and ugly! snarky comments to the baristas and customers… eye-rolling…glad i let her cut in front of me in the potty line!

Being an adult is like looking both ways before you cross the street and then getting hit by an airplane.

  15 Responses to “>going potty”

  1. Now see, and later you were wondering what to write about. You can always find something ;-).

  2. Well it appears that no good deed goes unpunished. Bad eye roll lady, good for you. Glad your bladder gave you a pass and hung on. I wanted to thank you so much for the kind words on my blog, it’s things like that and people like you who will keep me accountable..thank you.

    • We all need a bit of support in our endeavors from time to time…. Your’s is a great goal! I know that when I was going thru the weight-loss drama, I needed all the compliments, recognition, atta-boys I could get….

  3. >at least it's only pee Tina! i'm so glad that i don't have the other problem – so far anyway!!

  4. Sherri, you definitely missed your calling. You always had a way of telling stories even before the MS. You should take your show on the road. At least then you’d always have your own potty!

  5. Great post! Humorous, but sounds awful. I hope they can give you something for it.

    • i don’t know if they can or not Lisa… i’m learning to just make it part of my life… i put some toilet paper in the car just in case i gotta do a side of the road emergency stop LOL

  6. >OMG :0TMI :OLMAO :Dsry about phone:(

  7. So well written. I felt your pain. Now I need to potty.

  8. OMG :0
    TMI :O
    LMAO 😀

    sry about phone

    • at least it’s only pee Tina! i’m so glad that i don’t have the other problem – so far anyway!!

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