Feb 232013
  • I have decided to opt of the whole aging thing. I really… really… don’t like the obscene things aging is doing to my vessel. I mean… think about it. You know things are bad when my boobs not only sag & flop into my arm pits, but also manage to flop into my ol’ man’s arm pits too. That is just plain sad.
  • I was doing my monthly boob check the other day… you know how you’re supposed to pinch the nipple a bit to check it for discharge & such.. yeah… well, first I had to FIND my nipple. It was pretty much a scavenger hunt.
  • They were eventually located underneath my boob.
  • Jowls. What the hell kind of evil curse is that one about? I have jowls…

  • And see those droopy eyes? Yep, I have those too…. and the facial hair. At least I can shave, pluck, and otherwise maim my face to be rid of the fur that is growing there.
  • So, I want the aging waiver form to sign please.
  • Oh, and my nose… it sort of resembles WC Fields….at least mine is still it’s normal color and not all mottled & purplish-red. There is that.

  • I finally made it to payday! Oh sweet relief. Sweet, sweet relief. Now maybe we can get back to living once again.
  • I learned a new skill today. Keeping the baseball book… there was a tournament this weekend and Coach’s manager kids didn’t show up. So I got a crash course in keeping the book… My plan had been to take a few pictures during the game. Alas, that did not happen. I did manage to get a few shots of the kids before, between, and after games. I’m sure you’ll have an opportunity to see them here in a day or so.

Being an adult is like looking both ways before you cross the street and then getting hit by an airplane.

  5 Responses to “Getting Old”

  1. When I sit at my kitchen table with my computer in the evenings, one of the first things I do is take off my bra. Right after that, due to memory loss, I try to figure out why there are two manatees in my lap.

  2. I love the way that Katy thinks. And sadly know exactly where you and Karen are coming from. Sucky, sucky, sucky.

    What did your spend your first pay day (this time around) on. I do hope it included a (small) treat or two for you.

  3. I opted out of aging quite some time ago. I just don’t wear my glasses, so I don’t notice much. Well, okay… I can’t miss the sagging boobs, I may not see them, but I feel them resting atop the bulging tummy. Oh well, as Katy states, it beats the alternative, I wish I had a payday. We are not doing well financially, and it’s my fault.

  4. I keep offering to find them for you,……
    I am a beast of a scavenger hunter!!!!!!
    And by the way I like the warmth they give me……..

  5. Sagging and getting old and growing weird hair is really preferable to the alternative.

    At least so far as I know.

    Ask me again after I’m dead and gone. I might say, “Oh hell no. I never would have put up with the saggy skin if I’d known about THIS!”

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