i’ve been feeling pretty frumpy lately…. i hate that feeling… why can’t i just be comfortable in my own skin?
i’m over weight… yes i know… i have been over weight since the birth of my spawn… i don’t consider myself obese (although the health charts do)…but i prefer to think of myself as rubenesque… ha!
i had been doing pretty well losing some weight prior to my diagnosis… and for the past 6 months i have resorted to that old friend of mine… food… yes, food… i drown myself in it… i seek comfort in it… it makes me happy, it makes me angry, it makes me sad, it fulfills me… you see it meets many of my emotional needs… wrong.. i know
when the doc put me on copaxone i was excited! not because of the excrutiatingly painful injections, or the fact that there is about an 80% chance that my MS will be slowed a bit… but because copaxone is injected into fat… my doc said that people of my size tend to do better on this drug… hmmm… so i immediately embraced my fat… sick isn’t it? and i ate…and i ate…and i ate… and i continue to eat… what the hell?
and exercise is not really happening for me… i’m going to buy a bathing suit (scary shit) so that i can put my fat ass in the pool… that will help some…
depressing… and i’m not sure what is going on with the hair… on my head 😉
it’s at the point that if i’m going to keep it super short and choppy, well, it needs a shave… if not, if i’m going to grow it a bit then i’m in one of those bad hair places for a month or so… i look like a dork…like a bowl was placed atop my noggin and my hair trimmed neatly around it…. bleh